November 6, 2008
He thinks I cheated on him, but I didn’t.
me and my boyfriend have been together 5 months he split up with me yesterday because he thinks i cheated on him and i never what do i do? x
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Filed under Teenage Agony Aunt Letters by Agony Aunt

Comments on He thinks I cheated on him, but I didn’t. »
You need to review your behaviour to find the truth. Either you did something which he misunderstood or someone’s been spreading false rumours about you. If that’s the case, you can explain the truth. If he doesn’t accept the truth, it means he doesn’t know who you really are and you’re better off without him. Do you really want a boyfriend who doesn’t trust you and thinks you’re a liar? Love is worthless without trust.
The other possible explanation is that your boyfriend has cheated on you and wants to shift the blame onto you so he can end the relationship and get to blame you at the same time- as a way to avoid taking responsibility for his actions. If this is the case, you’re also far better off without him. If he has cheated he will believe you’d do the same; cheaters believe all people cheat. Liars believe all people lie.
Be realistic and not naive here so you don’t get hurt. Face him directly and ask him if he’s cheated? If he refuses to talk to you and gets into another relationship soon, you’ll have your answer.
If you truly didn’t cheat, then you shouldn’t stay with a man who doesn’t know& appreciate your true character. It’s better to cut your losses& forget him. If your self-esteem isn’t low, you’ll know you can do much better for a boyfriend than this loser.
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I hope the advice I gave helped you. You can find me anytime at anonymousletters.net I am an agony aunt who answers help letters for free. I like helping people and don’t like to see others in pain.
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Look up EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) on Google. This method is great for helping you build your confidence& getting rid of stress.
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if he really loves you then he would have believed you in the first place
maybe you said or did something which he misunderstood
if he thinks your a liar and he doesnt believ you then you can always go out with somebody else
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First up, you need to talk to this guy about what actually happened. If you already have and he still came to this conclusion, then you guys obviously weren’t meant to be. It might be hard now, but if there isn’t enough trust after 5 months for him to hear your side of the story, then it’s better to move on and leave the baggage behind you.
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Yes, review the situation. Talk to him and explain what you define at cheating and what he defines as cheating. Therefore, you can both talk things through. Hope this helps.
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If he really wont believe you, how do you know he will take you seriously with anything else? Please, find somebody whos worthy of your honest nature.
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you could look at this as a tester on your relatrionship if he cant belive on something like this. what makes you think he is able to trust you altogether. as your partner for 5mnths he should have trust in you. if he doesnt why would you want to be with someone like that anyway?
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You obviouysly cheated you whore!
just tell him the truth, its the best you can do.
hes obv heartbroken by it,
and he doesnt need any more lies.
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I can totally relate. I had the same situation happen to me. My boyfriend thinks i cheated and i didnt, I would never do that to him, to us. He saw something, that in his eyes was more than it was. He claims I was being affectionate with another man, when in fact i was only shaking his hand. There is alot more to the story but bottom line is that he saw me shaking this guys guy, he thinks i was holding it romantically and being affectionate. Ive tried to explain to him, there was nothing romantic, affectionate or anything like that. He doesnt believe me, we tried to work it out but he still calls me a liar and a cheater.. so now its over! Its hard to lose someone when you didnt do anything! Im starting to realize that maybe all his trust issues and insecurities are the problem and not necessarily me.
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tell him the truth he dont need more lies and if he wants to carry on with you then thats a bonus
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i am a 26 year old mother of three. my fiance andi brokeup a couple of weeks ago and got back together. we were only back together for 2 days when some people told him i had cheated. i love him with everything i have in me. i just want him to know i didnt do it but he wont even talk to me. im just lost. i love jim and we should still be a family with our children. does anyone have any advice. how do i gain his trust back? i dont want to be without him.please help.
lost and all alone,brandi
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if he thinks you cheated on him thats his problem..sit him down explain to him you wouldnt do that to him and ask him why he thinks this because if theres no trust hunny theres no love x
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ask him why he thought that you were cheating on him and then you have to talk to him and if he loves you he’ll belive you and if not its his loss because he lost someone very nice.
try to get one of his friends to show him what you wrote on this site to show him that you didnt cheat and you really love him.
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there are 2 ways you can go about this, your boyfriend obviously has trust issues and i can almost certainly say that if you end up back together that they are going to cause problems down the line, so the way i see it is that you can accept what has happened and be thankful that it happened sooner rather than later and that he hasnt turned round after 2 years and broke your heart by dumping you over his suspicions! or you can try to convince him that you really havnt cheated on him. if i were you i would be very wary about why he is so suspicious… in my experience when someone accuses you of cheating when you havnt there is a 99.9% chance that they are the ones who have cheated and they realise that you could be doing it to.. it seems odd to me that randomly after 5 months of healthy relationship this boy has turned round and accused you of something so serious and not trusted you when you have told him the truth! id be careful sweety because horrible things like this happen to good girls like you all the time. try and be brave and leave him behind, he isnt worth it! xx
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To brandy… i understand how frustraied and helpless you must feel when your innocent and the one person you need to believe you wont, you need to find out who told him these things and confront them prefferably infront of him. if not then try and do it by txt so you have evidence to show him that they were lying! just txt your fiance and explane that you got engaged because he was the one you wanted to spend the rest of your life with and that you would never even consider cheating on him and risking what you have, just tell him that if he loves you then he will at least talk to you for 10 minutes, just explane how heartbroken you are about him leaving you and tell him that at the end of the day what you have is worth fighting for and that for your families sake its only fair that he hears you out, try and get him alone in person so that your children dont get dragged into things and just pour your heart out to him! good luck sweety, i know what its like to be accused of cheating when you havnt and loosing the 1 you love, but i didnt get my man back, i really hope you do xx best of luck, steph xx
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to be honest i dont think you should take him back because he obviously doesnt trust you enough to believe you. move on x
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